News of Nancy’s recently-discovered pregnancy has been round the village quicker than Mercedes McQueen and although she may be all smiles now things haven’t always been roses and rainbows in Nancy‘s love life. Nancy Anne Osborne (née Hayton, previously Dean) hasn’t always been too successful in her choice of partners. Back in the old, old days when Nancy was [...]

The “will they, won’t they?” was a question everyone was asking at the start of the week. Although, not Darren because he was convinced it was all going to go to plan. And not Nancy because she didn’t know anything about it. And not Nancy‘s mum because she had engineered the entire situation to ensure [...]

Darren and Nancy, Dancy if you will, are quite the Hollyoaks’ dream couple – no cheating, no illegal activities, no enormous arguments and general drama favoured by the other love birds of the village. As much as my love for Darren knows no bounds, I am quite pleased for them. Because Darren is so wonderfully [...]

In keeping with the wonderful festive cheer always portrayed by TV soaps, the end of the Christmas period saw Hollyoaks’ best cat-fight, a bitch-fest to rival all others. It all kicked off when Carmel finally asked why she hadn’t been paid in about a billion years which seems pretty obvious considering there’s never anyone in [...]

As far as Christmas presents go, a trip to America to marry the fiancé who killed his previous fiancée an is probably going to kill you too, it’s not the best. Understandably, Mitzeee wasn’t overly happy although Warren started the week in a great mood – not even Brendan‘s (questionable) taste in decor was going [...]

Are they on? Are they off? Does Mitzeee want to date a murderer? Does she want to save herself or reach the same fate as Louise? Turns out all she wants is a pink bedroom which apparently makes the chance of being brutally strangled on her wedding day worth it. It was a week of [...]

We knew from the start that Silas kind of sucked at being a village murderer. For one thing, he went for months having killed only two victims, leaving pretty much everyone questioning his status as a “serial” killer. Alas, he eventually got his act together, offing victim #3 – Rebecca/Becks/Jenny/whatever her real name actually was. [...]

Tom! Thomas! Tomothy! Tom-diddly-omptious! Whatever endearing name it is you have taken to calling dear little Tom Cunningham, I salute you, because it’s not easy to sit and watch possibly one of the most abused characters in soap history. Yes, Tom has had a difficult life, having had to deal with the death of his [...]

….. an article in the Chester Herald. Yes, Darren and Nancy (Narren? Dancy?) took the next step with their relationship this week as she praised him in the local rag in an attempt to make him believe she cares about something other than running about in high heels and pencil skirts with a serial killer. [...]

We know Brendan, we know. But alas, the whole village was quick to jump to the conclusion that the lovable Irishman was a moiderer. Not that he can be too outraged since he did kill Danny Houston. Badly. At least if he was responsible for these killings it would be an improvement of his murdering [...]