Malachy

Blue eyed charmer Malachy rocked into the village as Kris’ bad boy, heavy drinking, lady loving bro. His libido is as such that it was only a matter of time before he hooked up with his female equivalent…and that would be shagaholic Mercedes. Much sexy time ensued, during which Malachy discovered he had the hiv. Did he share this with his lover? No. Did he abstain from shaggage, or at least use protection to protect her from potential hiv infestation? No. And thus team hiv was born.

It is a testament to his Oirish charm and pretty blue eyes that he managed to distract Mercy from the sheer evil of consciously infecting her with a life threatening disease by getting hitched to her in a pikey Hollyoaks Later wedding. Truly, a fairytale.

Second only to Justin in the c*ntery stakes.

McQueen index: 1

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